When good news makes you sad

I found out Wednesday night that Jennifer from church (Ryan and Alexis' mom) is pregnant.  With twins.  She's due in June.  And I don't know which makes me feel like a more horrible friend -- that I haven't noticed (she has kept it quiet up until now but was sure that I, of anyone, would figure it out), or that when she told me, tears sprung to my eyes and it felt like my heart was being ripped out of my chest.  I was sad and upset the rest of the night.  I love her and I'm happy for her, and this will make FIVE kids for her and I certainly am not jealous of THAT (can you imagine having to worry about college for five kids?!!!), but finding out that she was pregnant made me so sad because we're not having more kids -- and even though I probably couldn't handle another baby anyway, it doesn't make it hurt any less.  And I know I'm stupid for feeling this way, so just indulge me feeling a little sad right now, and then in June when the babies are born, and other than that I'll shut up about it.

Comments

[CaraH]

We all have the right to our pain, no matter how trivial it may seem to others. You are certainly entitled to allow your feelings to be valid. I'm sorry you're sad, Jen.

Love you hon!
~Cara

[Kelly]

I wanted to thank you for the wonderful gift today! I am sorry you are sad Jen and I think your feelings are very valid hon.
Thinking of you and love you
Kelly

[Sue]

Hon, you KNOW I'm feeling your pain. I feel it every f**ing time I find out someone is pregnant. The tears spring to my eyes and I feel so damned depressed.

Here for you, Jen.

Sue

[Kate]

(I don't know how I missed this entry.)

I'm sorry Jen. That's the worst feeling in the world. Even in my PPD haze, I have that feeling when I find out someone is pregnant. We won't be having any more kids either.

[Sandi]

Been there, done that. Feeling your pain hon!

Sorry you have to feel it as well!